Tuesday, April 13, 2010

The Real World.....OF DATING THAT IS!

Okay I have been told that I'm intimidating, mean, but most recently UNREALISTIC, but yet I'm a "good woman"! Really me?! I honestly don't see that so I became a bit defensive, thinking WHAT IS UNREALISTIC ABOUT WHAT I WANT/NEED FROM A RELATIONSHIP? So, I quickly chopped him up as not knowing what he is talking about and had him to explain what exactly was unrealistic about my wants.

Below are the characteristics I would love my partner to have:

Reliability/Dependability (these are interchangeable depending on who uses them, but they are very much the same:-)
Honesty
Career
Goals
No Kids ( I can bend on this as long as you don't have 50 baby mommas and you still freaking them all to avoid paying child support or just like to play emotional games..you are a loser and need to grow up, wrap it up, and get a HIV Test).

I have truly become fond of this dude because of his willingness to be truthful, from his view of course, no matter how much backlash he receives in our conversations. With that said, he told me that 3 out of the 5 goals are possible but I will need to learn to live without having all 5 because at least one will lack one of those requirements. I don't understand that, I really don’t! It's not like I'm asking for an arm, leg, or blood platelets just the 5 things that I know I bring to the table and everything else is a bonus!

Reliability/Dependability-you won't always get because something will distract them and it could be as simple a basketball game that will get you upset when they don't do exactly what you need at that time but they are always there when you are really in need. He raps it up with "but y'all forget all about the needs and rely on the wants"

Trustfulness (Honesty)- you can trust him but as soon as he tells you one lie to prevent from hurting your feelings again that's all you can think of. He said "If I say I don't like your shoes, they make your ankles look fat. You get mad." Okay I had to laugh at that one because some things should just be kept to yourself...but he went on and said that a guy can say "baby I love you, I'm not cheating on you, you are the only one for me. You still won't believe him, but if one of your girls lie and say they saw him at the club with Lisa you would believe the friend and not your man. Why?"

Career & Goals he agreed with...I couldn't believe it!

Kids- he believes it's hard to find someone our age without kids, so I need to give on that one. But if I find one with a "50" I need to look elsewhere because we shouldn't have kids after the age of 30....I guess I'm out of the baby making game since I hit that mark already.

As the conversation got deeper he had me second guessing myself and the things that I want out of a partner, but now I know it's possible to find that someone, I just may have started a bit to late on this journey and because of that he told me I may need to brighten my horizons and look outside the box in his opinion...THAT'S ANOTHER BLOG AND CONVERSATION ALL TOGETHER BUT I'M NOT TOTALLY AGIANST IT ANYMORE!

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